Go where, exactly?

ARodFail I'll have more to say on the latest episode of As A-Rod Turns tomorrow, and I don't really intend to waste time sifting through all of the nonsense every columnist with a publisher puts out there, but this article from CBS Sports' Gregg Doyel is just too much to let go. Obviously there's the head-desk worthy premise of "everyone should ignore this topic I'm about to write a whole column about, ya'll," but the media in general lacking in self-awareness is hardly a new thing. That said, I did find this to be a particularly amusing entry into the genre:

And [A-Rod's] not worth the attention we keep giving him. The New York tabloids have sent reporters to his minor-league games. Here I am somewhere above Albuquerque, and ESPN is probably about to talk about him some more. And look at me, writing about Agate-Rod from my seat in row 29.

[...]

If only we could start A-Rod's five-year clock right now. If only this colossal failure would do something right for the first time in years and just go away. Preferably before my plane flies over Flagstaff.

Yeah, because if there's a story that wouldn't generate an obscene amount of media attention, it'd be the sudden retirement of Alex Rodriguez with nearly half of his contract still on the books.